My Show with a Hollywood Pitch.
The Pitch is everything in Hollywood. Thank goodness I'm in Illinois.
Lost Scene from "The Empire Strikes Back".
Vader had lots more to say to Luke than just that "I'm your Father" stuff.
Star Trek: Voyager Plot Generator.
Randomly computer generate a Voyager Story.
Sexy Cartoon Babes!
It certainly ain't no Smurfs.
The Diary of
Grand Moff Tarkin.
But who is Lauren?
Differences between Network Executives and Science-Fiction Fans.
If you don't laugh, you're not a Sci-Fi Fan.
The Day I Whacked too many Ewoks.
What the Hell?
You know you're an American Doctor Who Fan when...
Things are different if you're British.
The Sci-Fi Hokey Pokey.
That's what it's all about.
Robert Beltran Gripe Generator.
Now you too can bitch like Robert Beltran.
My Show described with a Hollywood Pitch.
By Richard Whettestone.
The Pitch is everything in Hollywood. If you don't have a good pitch to sell your idea, you don't go anywhere (in Hollywood).
-- A List of Hollywood Pitches for my Science-Fiction series --
- - It's like Star Trek : Voyager. Except this time it's actually good.
- - It's just like Full House. No, wait. Never mind. It's not anything like Full House.
- - It's like . . . you know.
- - It's a Science-Fiction series. It has the core demographics of young white males with lots of money to spend - the exact Demographics that advertisers are looking for. It doesn't matter what the premise is about.
- - It's just like Buffy the Vampire Slayer. Except there's no one named Buffy on the show. And there's no Vampires to slay either.
- - It's a cross between "Deepwater Black" and "Mission Genesis".
- - The Monica Lewinsky show!
- - It's like Babylon 5: Crusade. Except this time it doesn't get canceled until after it premiers.
- - Imagine "ER" set in space. What? "Mercy Point"? What's that?
- - Screw the damn premise. Why'd you cancel "Christy", you Bastards!
- - The Babysitter's Club: 2032.
- - Where are the Irwin Allen actors buried?
- - Robert Saget's "Star Command Academy".
- - It's like "I'll Fly Away". Except with Aliens.
- - It's like the second season of SeaQuest. Except it's not pre-empted eighteen times.
- - Who cares about the premise? You're just going to screw it up anyway.
- - It doesn't matter what it's about, because it will never reach the high quality of "Captain Power".
- - Who wants to play a Millionaire on TV?
- - Alien Autopsy : The Series. Hosted by Jonathan Frakes.
- - The NEW New Twilight Zone.
- - The Harlan Ellison Hour.
- - Let's just slap Gene Roddenberry's name on it and sell it as is.