Lost Scene from "The Empire Strikes Back".
Star Trek: Voyager Plot Generator.
Sexy Cartoon Babes!
The Diary of Differences between Network Executives and Science-Fiction Fans.
The Day I Whacked too many Ewoks.
You know you're an American Doctor Who Fan when...
The Sci-Fi Hokey Pokey.
Robert Beltran Gripe Generator.
Fun Stuff
My Show with a Hollywood Pitch.
The Pitch is everything in Hollywood. Thank goodness I'm in Illinois.
Vader had lots more to say to Luke than just that "I'm your Father" stuff.
Randomly computer generate a Voyager Story.
It certainly ain't no Smurfs.
Grand Moff Tarkin.
But who is Lauren?
If you don't laugh, you're not a Sci-Fi Fan.
What the Hell?
Things are different if you're British.
That's what it's all about.
Now you too can bitch like Robert Beltran.
Differences between Network Executives and Science-Fiction Fans.
By Richard Whettestone.
NETWORK EXECUTIVES refer to their home as a Mansion or an Estate.
SCIENCE-FICTION FANS refer to their home as Sector Zero-Zero-One.
NETWORK EXECUTIVES watch the Nielsens evaluate programs.
SCIENCE-FICTION FANS watch Mike Nelson evaluate programs.
NETWORK EXECUTIVES replace shows like Space : Above & Beyond with other shows and wonder why the ratings are going down.
SCIENCE-FICTION FANS rewatch Space : Above & Beyond instead of the replacement shows because they really miss them. Thank Goodness they have them on Tape!
NETWORK EXECUTIVES consider a good battle to be when Chicago Hope was going up against ER.
SCIENCE-FICTION FANS consider a good battle to be when the Borg assaulted Starfleet at Wolf 359.
NETWORK EXECUTIVES think they can hook Science-Fiction fans with Sex and Violence.
SCIENCE-FICTION FANS are on the Internet getting better Sex and playing Violent Video Games while they wait for new shows like Babylon 5 and Space : Above & Beyond to stimulate their minds and their hearts.
NETWORK EXECUTIVES pre-empt SeaQuest 18 times.
SCIENCE-FICTION FANS sit through Golf and Football 18 times waiting for SeaQuest to come on.
NETWORK EXECUTIVES jump at the chance for a Spielberg series to promote.
SCIENCE-FICTION FANS reluctantly watch the Spielberg series while they wait for another J. Michael Straczynski or Kenneth Johnson series.
NETWORK EXECUTIVES show "Three Men & A Baby" as the Sunday Night Disney Family Movie.
SCIENCE-FICTION FANS tape "Three Men & A Baby" so they can show their friends in slow motion the "Three Men & A Baby-Boy" standing behind the curtain.
NETWORK EXECUTIVES try to build a solid night of highly rated programming.
SCIENCE-FICTION FANS try to build a full size replica of a Dalek War Machine in their basement.
* (Here's a Tip : Don't build it out of Cardboard if your basement is prone to flooding. In 1993 I lost both my Dalek and a full scale K-9).
NETWORK EXECUTIVES try to lure in famous Hollywood Actors to host Saturday Night Live.
SCIENCE-FICTION FANS watch Saturday Night Live since they have to stay up all night anyway because Space Precinct doesn't come on until 3 in the Morning.
NETWORK EXECUTIVES consider life's greatest reward to be a High Rated Successful Profitable Television Program.
SCIENCE-FICTION FANS consider life's greatest reward to be a Kenner Star Wars Missile Firing Boba Fett Proto-type Action Figure.
NETWORK EXECUTIVES have constant battles with people like Harlan Ellison over TV shows.
SCIENCE-FICTION FANS watch the credits of TV shows and wonder what kind of mother would name their son "Cordwainer".