My Show with a Hollywood Pitch.
The Pitch is everything in Hollywood. Thank goodness I'm in Illinois.
Lost Scene from "The Empire Strikes Back".
Vader had lots more to say to Luke than just that "I'm your Father" stuff.
Star Trek: Voyager Plot Generator.
Randomly computer generate a Voyager Story.
Sexy Cartoon Babes!
It certainly ain't no Smurfs.
The Diary of
Grand Moff Tarkin.
But who is Lauren?
Differences between Network Executives and Science-Fiction Fans.
If you don't laugh, you're not a Sci-Fi Fan.
The Day I Whacked too many Ewoks.
What the Hell?
You know you're an American Doctor Who Fan when...
Things are different if you're British.
The Sci-Fi Hokey Pokey.
That's what it's all about.
Robert Beltran Gripe Generator.
Now you too can bitch like Robert Beltran.
The Sexiest Cartoon Babes ever drawn on Paper!
(These Links Open new Windows)
The Ultimate Cartoon Babe, the others don't even come close to "The Baroness".
- Baroness - G.I.Joe.
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Pure Black. Long Black Hair. Black Outfit. Black Boots. Black Gloves. Black Rimmed Glasses. Black Bra. Against all that Black, that big Red Cobra Emblem on her chest couldn't do nothing else but highlight her chesty curves. The spoiled offspring of wealthy European aristocrats, she moved her way up from radicalism to terorrism and eventually into the ranks of Cobra. Destro's Girl, she probably just hung around him by default, since she's smart and knows how to use a man to work her way up the line of power (like Hillary). She is also probably the only person to know Destro's secret identity. Baroness is the most sought after Action Figure, causing a recent exclusive Toys'R'Us re-release of her to come about, now wearing a Blue Outfit to distinguish her from the original. We never did figure out that Accent. Sure she's pure evil, but it's not like she ever comitted murder or anything. And that two-parter ("Worlds without End") where Steeler, Clutch and Grunt found themselves on an alternate Earth where the Joe Team were all dead, Cobra ruled the Earth, and the Baroness (now a double-agent) had a serious long-time romance with Steeler, shows she's warm and soft inside (like a real woman). She even single handedly caused the alternate Universe's Cobra Commander's and Destro's forces to attack eachother in a fierce battle of power of such a great magnitude, that even though we never saw the outcome, we know Cobra sustained major power losses of global domination. Okay, the Baroness could handle that much power. And it was all for love no less. We'll miss Steeler for deciding to stay behind on that alternate Earth to rebuild the Joe Team, but we understand why he stayed.
- Scarlett - G.I.Joe.
Real Name: "Shana (Scarlett) O'Hara". Scarlett is the only female G.I.Joe to have more than one Action Figure version manufactured of her. Darn. Later to join the Ninja Force, Scarlett is buddy-buddy with Snake-Eyes, are favorite mute ninja in black. There's only one thing sexier than a red-head. And that's a red-head with Green Eyes. Bingo.
- Cover Girl - G.I.Joe.
Real Name: Courtney A. Krieger. Driver of the Wolverine vehicle, her first appearance in the first G.I.Joe TV Movie showed her with long Blonde Hair, then oddly enough, she was changed to have short Brownish-Red Hair, making her sometimes mistaken for Scarlett at first glance. We'll take either one. A fashion model in Chicago and New York, she grew tired of it and went to Armor School at Fort Knox, then joined G.I.Joe because she was proficient with deisel machines! Huh? And to top it all off, she's from Peoria, Illinois!
- Lady Jaye - G.I.Joe.
Possibly the First Cartoon Babe to show a girl with short hair as incredibly sexy, Lade-Jaye was Flint's girl, but we all know Flint was probably gay anyway. Armed with a crossbow as her primary weapon, it didn't take Lady-Jaye too long in the series to prove to everyone she had a bow for every occasion, including a Net Bow, Tracking Device Bow and Armor Piercing Bow. Cupid must have shot us with a Bow, because we fell in love with her. It may have been her scratchy Kathleen Turner/Margo Kidder voice (or the button shirt, see below) but we just had to have her. She was like the platonic loving caring female friend you just really had to nail. Lady-Jaye was featured on the series so much, she may have actually made more appearances than even Scarlett. When idiots screwed up the cartoon series in the early 1990's, Lady-Jaye was still there, this time in baby-blue and with the voice of a teenager. In fact, she looked like a teenager in the last episodes produced. Her Action Figure had a baseball cap. We wish she wore less. We're choosing to ignore that ancestral relationship to Destro we learned about when she inherited that castle.
- Carly - The Transformers.
"1984 Teenage Blondes". Yumm! Brought to us from the days of PacMan and The A-Team, the strong, intelligent and forceful Carly caused some trouble for Spike and BumbleBee, but her presence gave Spike a girlfriend, allowing the young teenage males to live a fantasy through him. While Spike Witwicky just came along for the ride in most Transformers adventures, Carly actually got involved in them during her few episodes, including journeying to Cybertron with Spike on a mission while trying to keep control of the newly built and intensely dumb Dinobots, and she also single handedly broke into the Decepticon's underwater base. Geesh! Stupid Girl. Jump ahead 20 years to 2006 and we find Carly and Spike have gotten married, and now have a son of their own, Daniel. Both Spike and his wife are now Ambassadors. Although she didn't appear too much in the future episodes, she never the less was there, making Carly the only sexiest animated Mom on the list. Carly Witwicky and family even carried over into "Transformers: 2010" and "Transformers: Headmasters" (1987 to 1988), a Japanese continuation of the American Cartoon Series, but now taking place an additional 5 years further into the future (years 2010 and 2011), bringing up her last seen estimated age to be around 30-something.
- Anastasia - Disney's Anastasia.
Imagine Kimmy Gibler from "Full House", except this time actually cute, and you got Anastasia. I haven't seen the movie, but she's damn hot on the video box cover.
- April O'Neal - Ninja Turtles.
Ace Reporter April O'Neal. They should have removed those stupid Ninja Turtles and done a whole Spin-Off Series just based on her. Many women don't realize that if a woman wears a shirt that buttons down the front (instead of pulling it over your head), she's automatically a notch sexier to ALL boys, because they have that fantasy of watching her slowly unbutton it.
- Daphne Blake - Scooby Doo.
The only time when Daphne ever looked sexier than her usual appearance was when she visited April O'Neal's tailor and wore a Purple Jumpsuit for the 1980's "13 Ghosts of Scooby Doo" (13 episodes). Not even the annoying antics of new sidekick Flim-Flam stopped us from watching (but came pretty darn close). But hey, those 13 Ghosts got out of that old trunk chest again at the end of episode 13, so we're still waiting for the continuation of her new adventures.